It Is Well With My Soul

If you have a Chronic illness, then you have experienced that Twilight Zone moment when your diagnosis was first given. A part of you is hearing what the doctor is saying. The other part is almost in shock — engulfed with disbelief. This is the start of an emotional, physical and often times spiritual roller-coaster. One that none of us asked to ride on. One that seems hopelessly out of our control. Or is it? I have heard the diagnosis of a Chronic illness, more than once. Multiples are not unusual. Millions of patients can attest to that. And I have asked, “Why me?” But I have also asked, “Why not me?” One of the most important things that any patient of a Chronic illness can do is embrace their condition. Those words are easier said than done. I know. Still, they beg the question: Have you accepted your diagnosis?

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A Chronic illness is not the same as being terminally ill. Yet, there are five stages of grief involved: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance. The life you had is gone. This is your new normal. Many of the things that you once did are lost to an affliction that you didn’t ask for. And, if you are like most patients, you don’t feel that you deserve. It’s a lot to take in. It doesn’t seem fair. Why is this happening? You lament about what you could have done differently. Some seem to have done everything right and still they are diagnosed with a Chronic illness. It’s confusing, irritating and overwhelming. While you are trying to cope with medications, treatment, side-effects, lifestyle changes, symptoms and emotions … you may also be wrestling with your religious beliefs.

Faith is easy to have, when life is good. It becomes a different ballgame, in trying times. Some people question their faith, when life gets hard. They may even become angry with God — confused by the turmoil that has engulfed their comfort zone. Often times, adults drift away from church and faith. There isn’t a specific reason. It just happens. The diagnosis of a Chronic illness can bring them back. They now need the assurance, hope and peace that faith provided. The things they so easily took for granted, they want again. Yearn for it. For others, who have never had a religious belief system, difficulty can actually lead them to faith. It’s a very personal walk, down an often lonely path. If you are struggling with your faith, you may be asking, “Why did God let this happen to me?” And that’s a good question. We don’t always understand why, at the moment we are going through an ordeal. It may take months — even years — to know. But one day, we will understand (1 Corinthians 13:12).

Personally, I believe that God has a plan for each of us. To get us where He needs us, God uses every tool. He doesn’t create our suffering, but he allows good to flourish from it. He knows that in these difficult moments, we are gaining insight … growing as individuals … serving as examples … literally inspiring others. Good emerges. In Romans 8:28, we are told, “… God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.”

If you take a few moments to look through the Holy Bible, you’ll note that affliction and suffering are ever present. In fact, there are at least 14 words in Hebrew and Greek that translate to “affliction”. Think about that. Suffering is part of this earthly world. It always has been. None of us are immune. Chronic illnesses, i.e. Alcoholism, Mental illness, Atrophy, Leprosy, Epilepsy, Obesity, Glaucoma/Blindness, etc., were present in biblical times. What you are experiencing isn’t new. Such afflictions have been around for centuries.

Thanks to modern medicine, today, we have options that make living with Chronic illness much easier. Even modern society has changed — becoming more accepting of those who suffer from these diseases. Yes, there are still problems that need to be addressed. Awareness must go on to educate others. The more people understand, the better off that we become as a society. Healthier living. Preventative measures. Learning has its rewards. There will, unfortunately, always be individuals who are bigoted, who discriminate, who bully, who judge, etc. We cannot control human nature. But we can pray for them. The Lord works in mysterious ways.

If you have a Chronic illness, work towards accepting it. Stay optimistic. Take the necessary steps — changes —  to manage your health. It will provide much needed stability to your life. Learn to live each and every day to the fullest. Appreciate what you can do. Maintain a clear perspective — set a few goals. Avoid additional stress. Count your blessings. Your life has changed before. Think about it. Perhaps, it was when you went off to college? Or when you entered military service? Or when you married? This isn’t the end of the world. This is a new journey. So embrace it, as I have. It isn’t the path that I would have chosen. Then again, in a weird sort of way, maybe it is. I have always enjoyed a challenge. But, at the end of the day, it is well with my soul. And that peace is priceless.

 

 

Reference Links:

http://www.apa.org/helpcenter/chronic-illness.aspx

http://www.christianitytoday.com/pastors/2012/july-online-only/doesgodallowtragedy.html

http://www.jennifermartinpsych.com/yourcolorlooksgoodblog/2013/09/the-five-stages-of-grief-for-chronic.html

https://www.gotquestions.org/Bible-affliction.html

https://www.biblicaltraining.org/library/diseases-bible

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1070773/

*Photo by Joshua Earle on Unsplash

Be Not Afraid …

I have a confession to make … I love lighthouses. I always have. Back in the 90’s, I actually ventured inside one (1879 Hooper’s Strait Lighthouse). To really appreciate the message and function of a lighthouse, you must experience it both inside and out. From the outside, like a sailor at sea, you appreciate its guiding light. The comfort that it surely provides, during a tempest storm … to breathe easy … home is near. From the inside, you stand by its massive beacon and look out across the distant water … you feel the isolation … the loneliness … and you realize that the lighthouse keeper’s duty was more than just keeping a light on … it was also a biblical reminder … “Be not afraid”.

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Scripture is filled with verses that tell us to reject fear and draw strength from God, i.e. Jeremiah 1:8, Matthew 14:27, Mark 5:36, etc. Yet, in crisis situations, we often forget that. Likewise, Judaism teaches to “Fear not”. And Islam also teaches that one must cope with fear. Like love and the Golden Rule, this is a message that transcends languages and religions. 

If you or a loved one have been diagnosed with a Chronic illness, it’s easy to be afraid. The unknown is a scary place. The what-ifs can and do keep you awake at night. I know. I have been there, more than once. If you allow those worst-case scenarios to consume you, it can lead to other problems including additional Chronic illnesses. So it’s important to realize that fear, while a natural instinct, can also be an unnecessary burden in our lives. When I feel fear closing in on me, I always think of a lighthouse. For a moment, I close my eyes and drift back to that warm summer day when I first entered one in Maryland. I remember the salty air and climbing the narrow steps up to the beacon … looking out over the waters of the Chesapeake … and feeling closer to God … at peace. 

The Coronavirus pandemic has heightened fear in millions. We cannot ignore this added health risk, for our sake and that of so many others. It must be acknowledged and taken seriously. Preventative measures, many of which have upended our lives, must be embraced. But we can take comfort that we are not alone. God is with us. And like the lighthouse, we can stand firm. This storm, as dark and scary as it is, will pass. Be not afraid. 

Reference Links:

https://www.biblegateway.com/quicksearch/?search=be+not+afraid&searchtype=phrase&spanbegin=1&spanend=73&version1=9

https://reformjudaism.org/%E2%80%9Cfear-not%E2%80%9D

Coping With Fear

*Photo by Cole Wyland on Unsplash

The Unknown …

The “unknown”, as it has come to be called in our house, is a very scary thing. If you are a perfectionist like me, it can be sheer torture. No matter how hard we try, we cannot make this earthly world perfect. Even the most idyllic families will, sooner or later, get theirs. Why? Life has imperfections. So, curve-balls and sucker-punches will come. There is no way to avoid them. I have had to remind myself of that a lot, this month. Because, like millions of others, we have had the wind and much of the holiday spirit slapped out of us by the unknown. A loved one was blindsided by a diagnosis. More tests were needed. Then, a biopsy … and still we waited … and waited … consumed by the unknown. Until, despite the madness, we remembered that we were not alone. At that moment, a peace began to fall over us like gently falling snow. Yes, the “unknown” still exists. But our faith and resolve is stronger. 

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” … Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” — Joshua 1:9 (NIV)

The unknown has a way of disrupting our lives. It knocks us off our feet. It takes the wind out of our sail. It baffles us, frustrates us and fills us with fear — sometimes anger. And if that describes your life, today, please remember that you are not alone. I feel your pain. Many of us have. What you are feeling is natural. Millions have reacted the same way. The unknown has instilled fear in the bravest of men and women, throughout history. None of us are immune to its effects. But we can fight back.

Prayer enables us to cope. And, miraculously, it can heal. Prayer allows the mind to focus positively, instead of being tormented. It lowers stress levels. Medical science has seen its results. If you or a loved one are ill, you don’t need the added impact of anxiety or depression. You need inner peace to make the best decisions, to rest, to heal. Prayer is the answer.

In these times of trial and loneliness, we must remember that God walks with us. He hears us. He comforts. And our prayers are still answered. There is light, at the end of this tunnel. Options exist. Healing can and will come. Joy will fill us, again. Laughter will slip from our lips. And life will go on. Until then …

May God Bless you & yours, in the coming year. And may the “unknowns” of your life be few and far between!

 

 

Reference Links:

https://www.webmd.com/balance/features/can-prayer-heal#1

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation/2015/05/07/power-of-prayer/70943182/

*Photo by Thomas Kelley on Unsplash

 

All I Want …

Around this time of year, we often hear the dreamy wishes of young and old alike. Usually, these involve gifts (some more expensive than others) … travel … parties, etc. Hints are dropped … in texts … in emails … on Post-it notes, etc. To say, there are plenty of grand expectations is an understatement. But how important are these wishes? I wonder. People tend to take a lot for granted. Yet, now is the time we should all consider what we truly want — what we need. Life’s simple pleasures are far more priceless than they are given credit for being. Because these are the things that add true meaning to our lives. 

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Consider, for a moment, the popularity of a certain Christmas song. After 25 years, Mariah Carey has hit No. 1 on Billboard with “All I Want For Christmas Is You“. What resonates with fans? Is it an old favorite that stirs sentimental feelings? Or is it the simplicity of the message? Love.

As December and 2019 slips by, do some serious soul-searching. What are the things that are most important to you? For me, it’s my guys (husband, son & fur-baby). It’s their love that sustains me and encourages me. My faith, praise God, which has always lifted me. It’s good health, for me and my family. The ability to manage my Chronic illnesses. The joy of good friends, at the holidays and all year long. The quiet of our home, in the evening. The calm of flickering candles. Holding hands (even in church). Sharing a hug. Stealing a kiss under the mistletoe. The sheer peace of knowing, no matter what comes along, they have my back. And I have theirs. Some things cannot be bought. They must be felt. In this modern-age when our society seems all too willing to put a price on anything and everything, the simplest of pleasures are still the best. May each of you embrace yours.  Merry Christmas!

 

 

Reference Links:

https://www.billboard.com/articles/business/chart-beat/8546418/mariah-carey-all-i-want-for-christmas-is-you-number-one

*Photo by Tom Mossholder on Unsplash